Blood
by SetTheTruthFree
Summary: That was how Sirius was found Passed out from loss of blood and pain, on the bathroom floor. Rated M for a reason. Near suicide fic, my first one. R&R please. One shot, but might be made into a twoshot.


**Disclaimer-**I don't own Sirius or Remus, or any other Harry Potter characters, so please don't sue me...Also if this story is like another story on the site, Please don't report me, my subconcious might tell me a story that's already up...

'Damn it! Why is it _always_ my fault?' Sirius Black thought as he picked up the shattered pieces of glass. A piece slipped, slicing his arm. He let his bark-like laugh as he watched his 'noble' and 'pure' blood gush out of his arm and onto the carpet.

Usually this would hurt, but it was refreshing to be able to spill such _precious_ blood. He made sure his brother, or any other member of his 'family', wasn't watching and slipped the shard of blood covered glass into his pocket.

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At home, where no one watched him, it was easy to hide all of the cuts and scars. Even if they did see them, they didn't care. At school, it wasn't so easy. There he shared a dorm with three other guys and he could only hide so much with a towel.

It was one thing to make up excuses for the scars though. 'The most ancient and noble house of black' was bound to have dangerous plants and animals living around it. But it was the new cuts, the new stains, and the fresh blood on a shard of glass that no one understood why he carried with him that he couldn't explain.

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Sirius would dash back to the dorm room and lock himself away in the bathroom or even in his bed after dinner most nights. He'd lock the door and sit, slowly drawing out the shard of glass and slicing himself. He'd watch his blood trickle down his arm and onto the floor, creating a new stain to be seen. He'd slice his arm again and again until he no longer felt any pain.

It was his way of grieving for his crappy life. One night he wasn't sure how it was going to end, so he wrote a note. A note that was for the only person he loved; the only person who truly mattered in his life.

He folded the note, sealed it with a kiss and a smear of blood, and gently laid it on his pillow. 'They'd find it…and me….eventually' He thought.

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_Remus,  
This is just for you. I thought you should know that I love you. And I mean I'm _in _love with you. I've been in love with you since that first smile you gave me. Ever since I first saw the way your eyes light up when you get to eat an oversized chocolate bar or when you get a brand new book. Everything about you made me love you. And please don't worry about me…I'll be fine…I wrote this for you, and I think you should read it without anyone peering over your shoulder:_

_  
Every time I look around  
Your always there to smile  
Every time I start to frown  
You remind me there's still tomorrow_

_Every time I feel your touch  
I get shivers down my spine  
Every time I hear your voice  
I think it blows my mind_

_Every time you smile at me  
I know that you're the one  
Every time your eyes light up  
I know that I love you_

_Every time you call my name  
It sounds so very sweet  
Every time you look at me  
It simply can't be beat_

_Every line of this poem here  
Is to say only one thing  
Every word of every sentence  
Is to tell you I love you_

_I just want you to take everything in that poem seriously. I also need to say that I'm sorry. It's confusing now, but you'll get it when you find me._

_Now that all of that's been said, there's just one more thing to be heard and that's Goodbye Remus, and I know you'll just be happier without me.  
_  
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"Goodbye? But that makes it sound like he's leaving forever…but he says we'll find him…Gods. He wouldn't…but that smell…I know that smell…SIRIUS!" the werewolf screamed as he starting to frantically search for his wand. Remus dashed to the bathroom door and broke it open.

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That was how Sirius was found; Passed out from loss of blood and pain, on the bathroom floor. A deep and long gash on one arm, and the shard of glass in the hand of the other.

Remus dashed in and immediately started casting every healing spell he knew to offset any damage Sirius could have done to himself. While casting the spells Remus couldn't contain the tears that fell on the other mans chest.

He finally knelt down to Sirius and just picked him up and started cradling him. James stumbled into the dorm to grab something from his trunk but seeing the blood bought his attention to the open bathroom door, where Remus lay with Sirius in his arms growling possessively. James, upon seeing that, slowly turned around and sped out of the dorm. Eventually Remus moved Sirius onto his bed and sat there the entire night, waiting for Sirius to come around again, crying over him the whole time.

When Sirius stirred, he said the first thing that came to mind in a weak and raspy voice. "I knew you would find me. You always do, even when I don't want to be found"

"Of course I would find you - I will never let you leave me I love you to much for that Siri," Remus sweetly replied before Sirius fell into a deep sleep.

_Editors note: This is so sad and fluffy and well sad …_

**Author's Note: **Well said Gvsl. Funny story about how this story came to be. I was sitting at school one day, listening to music and the idea just came to me…okay I lied, not a very funny story, but it's odd that I was at SCHOOL when the idea for a near suicide fic came to me plus I started writing it there too…hope you guys enjoyed it I'm thinking about writing another chapter to it…maybe just what happened after Sirius woke up again or maybe from Remus' POV. Lemme know if you guys want a second chapter. As always R&R

_Until Next Time_

Happy FanFictioning

STTF  
"I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three"-- Elayne Boosler


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